Updated: Mar 9
Learn how to overcome fear with Events4Anyone owner, May Silvers as she shares her top three tips for overcoming fear in the event planning business.
What Exactly Is Fear?
Fear has so many names that may include insecurity, uncertainty, and low self-esteem to name a few.
Is fear a learned behavior or are we born with it? Personally, I believe it is a learned behavior.
Look at a baby for instance, when they are learning how to walk, they are not afraid of falling or the pain that comes with falling. They fall, they get up, and they try again. They have no fear!
As an adult, we have so many fears. Fear of failure. Failure is a BIG word with so many different meanings. That word itself probably encompasses many, many fears.
The Reality of Fear
I had let fear take over my desire to grow my event planning business. Not once, not twice, but three times!!!! Each time, I was so afraid that my business would not make enough money so instead of giving it my all to grow my event planning company, I went back to the hotel industry and got a job instead. I did the exact opposite thing that inspired me to start my own event planning company which is to work my own hours, create my own financial future, and be able to spend time with my loved ones. I ended up working MANY long hours and neglecting my business. I made enough to support myself but the bank account never grew and I had NO time to spend with my loved ones. FEAR got me to this place, and I let it happen three times. Shame, shame, and shame on me.
A New Friend
What if we can turn fear into our new best friend? Does that sound crazy to you???? Well, it sure did to me initially. I chose to befriend FEAR because I believe in keeping my friends close and my enemies closer. And FEAR is my enemy numero uno so I am going to start labelling it as "friend".
Just like when you decide to make a new friend, you want to know more about this friend, right? So, I am going to try and understand what the fear is. Once I understand more about the fear then I can set out to find solutions to overcome it.
3 Tips To Know Your New "Friend" Better
1) Talk to people who have experienced the same fear
Ask them why they feel that way and how did they overcome that fear.
Once you find people who are going through the same feelings as you, you know you are not alone and fear becomes less threatening and scary.
2) Dissect the fear
Analyze the pros and cons of letting fear take over.
Is it more fearful to do something about the fear or should I just accept the fear and live with it?
Which is more painful? Staying fearful or facing fear in the face and tell it that you are its new BFF?
If your path is to befriend the fear, come up with an action plan to tackle the fear. You need to show your new "friend" who's in charge here.
3) What can you learn from fear?
If you had a past experience that you would associate the fear with, ask yourself, what did you learn from that experience? Why was it so fearful?
Acknowledging the fear gives you clarity on why you felt that way. Once you understand where the origin of the fear is, often you will realize that the fear is unfounded and frankly, downright silly.
As an entrepreneur, and even in life, if you are not experiencing some form of fear or being uncomfortable then you are stagnant in personal growth and in income growth.
I am not saying that we shouldn't stop and smell the roses. I am saying we should deliberately expose ourselves to some form of "fear". The more you do it, the more your brain gets used to that feeling of being fearful. Eventually, the feeling of being fearful gets smaller and smaller.
In my world, fear means new challenges which in turn means growth. Remember, the most dangerous place to be, especially in business, is to be "comfortable". This is a great article from Entrepreneur that talks about how to get comfortable with being uncomfortable and how to overcome fear, baby steps at a time.
Let's Face Fear Together
So, are you going to send FEAR a friend request anytime soon? If you need a buddy to go talk to this new "friend", feel free to give me a call and I will be there to hold your hand, say hi to your new BFF, and introduce you to the team of Unstoppable Eventrepreneurs in our mentorship program who have turned fear into their BFF.
Standing by you,
May Yeo Silvers